Discussion:
Semi-OT: On preventing suicide - one therapist's take
(too old to reply)
l***@yahoo.com
2019-07-02 18:22:09 UTC
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Whether you agree with him or not, it's kind of refreshing to see a no-nonsense parental approach to those young people who aren't seriously depressed; they just want unearned attention, IMO. (Yes, there are plenty of teens who are committing suicide for the same crushing problems that adults have, but there are plenty who commit suicide for reasons that most TEENS wouldn't have considered serious, a generation ago.)

But at the same time, while I often appreciate his philosophy, I think he should think twice about HOW he suggests phrasing it when talking to teens directly. (Especially in one of the last paragraphs - that is, the third "statement" he suggests making.)

https://www.herald-dispatch.com/features_entertainment/john-rosemond-mother-seeks-advice-for-year-old-son-expressing/article_01b67b9c-156d-5e12-a899-d8cdeda8ec80.html

Q: "On several occasions over the last six months or so, our 12-year-old son has told us he's been thinking about suicide. Apparently, he's been the target of a couple of school bullies and sometimes feels like life is too much. We've talked to him, tried to help him express his feelings, and tried to help him figure out how to solve these problems, but do you have other suggestions? Other than these three episodes, by the way, things in his life seem to be great. He has lots of friends, is liked by his teachers, and doesn't act generally depressed."


Can you guess the response?



Lenona.
Michael OConnor
2019-07-02 19:28:16 UTC
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Post by l***@yahoo.com
Can you guess the response?
Let me guess - His parents should buy him the new Apple Iphone?

If it were my kid, I would teach him how to box, to deal with his bullies with his fists. But if it were my kid I would have already taught him how to use his fists, but only to defend himself or somebody else, never to attack somebody. A major problem with today's boys is too many of them have never been in a physical fight in their lives. I'm going to sound like an old fart but when I was a kid I got in fights, and we settled things that way.

Boys are no longer allowed to be boys anymore, they're programmed to sit indoors all day long in front of computers playing video games or on their Iphones on Facebook and Twitter instead of playing ball outside or riding bikes with real friends as opposed to artificial friends that they will never meet who are only there to click "Like" for them. Too many kids these days get bullied and instead of fighting, they take a gun to school or commit suicide.
l***@yahoo.com
2019-07-02 20:27:13 UTC
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Post by Michael OConnor
Post by l***@yahoo.com
Can you guess the response?
Let me guess - His parents should buy him the new Apple Iphone?
Not at all. You could have tried READING it...
Kenny McCormack
2019-07-02 22:58:57 UTC
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Post by Michael OConnor
Post by l***@yahoo.com
Can you guess the response?
Let me guess - His parents should buy him the new Apple Iphone?
If it were my kid, I would teach him how to box, to deal with his
bullies with his fists. But if it were my kid I would have already
taught him how to use his fists, but only to defend himself or somebody
else, never to attack somebody. A major problem with today's boys is
too many of them have never been in a physical fight in their lives.
I'm going to sound like an old fart but when I was a kid I got in
fights, and we settled things that way.
Except that's never how it works out in practice.

Reality is funny that way.
--
"You can safely assume that you have created God in your own image when
it turns out that God hates all the same people you do." -- Anne Lamott
Michael OConnor
2019-07-03 00:18:09 UTC
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Post by Kenny McCormack
Post by Michael OConnor
If it were my kid, I would teach him how to box, to deal with his
bullies with his fists. But if it were my kid I would have already
taught him how to use his fists, but only to defend himself or somebody
else, never to attack somebody. A major problem with today's boys is
too many of them have never been in a physical fight in their lives.
I'm going to sound like an old fart but when I was a kid I got in
fights, and we settled things that way.
Except that's never how it works out in practice.
Reality is funny that way.
Maybe if he popped one of those kids in the face they would leave him alone.
l***@yahoo.com
2019-07-03 21:34:01 UTC
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So, now that you've read the response (I hope) what do you think?
l***@yahoo.com
2019-07-22 17:26:46 UTC
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Follow-up:

https://www.parentguru.com/articles/view/1904?return=%2Farticles%2Findex%2Fage%3A8

First lines:

"My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the column ranged from 'many thanks' to 'how interesting' to fear and loathing..."



Lenona.

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