Discussion:
DANA PLATO: LYING JUNKIE
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s***@gmail.com
2016-04-06 06:15:49 UTC
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Recently looked up what the remaining strokes stars were up to career wise being aware of Gary's death notwithstanding, and was shocked to find Dana had died almost seventeen years ago. Is it so far removed from the event to be sad about her after so long,although I am. She appeared to be a young lady with no evidence of vitriol/ spitefulness/ anger in her character whatsoever and with what we now know was an extremely difficult period in her life. Perhaps her naivety and trust of everyone was her downfall with the usual Que. of freeloaders and hacks all too eager to appear willing to take another bite. It appears that the thread was started by the very same, when at her lowest and final moment there appears to be another waiting in the obligatory Que.. Dana may have in her last moments demonstrated how strong she actually was, by ending her tormentors ability to berate her, the hateful words of the author of this thread are as meaningless as themselves. RIP Dana
r***@hotmail.com
2020-07-24 11:52:07 UTC
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(The Associated Press)
Former TV child actress Dana Plato has died of what
police say is an
accidental overdose of a painkiller and valium.
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At least the world can now rest easy that one of the three brat stars of the
hit sitcom 'Diff'rent Strokes' has mercifully rid the world of their juvenile
delinquent presence.
It would seem the Terrible Trio of Sitcom Fuck-Ups --
woman-slapper, Gary
Coleman; murderer-cum-drug-pusher, Todd Bridges; and the
all-around
embarrassment, Plato herself -- had made a bet to see whose face
could land
more covers on the National Enquirer. With this stunningly
successful feat of
suicide par excellence, it becomes apparent that Plato has
vaulted herself
into the lead by a nose.

The same nose she used to snort up
all that coke.
The skanky Plato, who had enough white lines running through
her veins to
shock Grandmaster Flash, was fired from her one-and-only bid for
stardom in
1984 for slutting herself around town and getting knocked up in
the process.
While such "sensitive" topics as bulimia, kidnapping, statutory
rape, drugs,
and green hair were not too taboo for NBC's overbearingly-cute
television
show, network executives apparently could not handle the
frightening thought
of the virginal Kimberly Drummond in a size-16 maternity
gown and escorted
Plato's pregnant butt off the set.

From that career high
point, the budding Heidi Fleiss went on to destroy two
lives: her own and
that of her bastard baby's. Like most eternally-high,
no-talent whores, Dana
Plato was branded unhireable and found that even small
parts on bad sitcoms
such as 'Webster' were hard to find. While Plato's
replacement, Danny
Cooksey, went on to win over the hearts (but not the
stomachs) of wholesome
family-oriented programme-lovers everywhere, Plato's
acting career
extinguished itself faster than you can say JM J. Bullock.
In the place of
an actual job, Plato divided her time between popping downers
and being the
kind of mother Joan Crawford's children would have been proud
to call 'Mommie
Dearest'. Surely Plato's now-teenaged son will soon know what
it's like to be
abandoned by your own good-for-nothing parents. Talk about
history repeating
itself -- Plato's mother freed herself of the demon spawn
she created when
Dana was but a pointy-tailed little infant.
Plato's greed-mongering adopted
parents were a better match. Much like
Macaulay's Culkin's screwed-up
parental figures, the elder Platos recognised
a money tree when they saw one
and made sure to teach young Dana the art of
career prostitution at an early
age. After steering the talent-free actress
through a host of commercials so
annoying they make that Pepsi girl a breath
of fresh air by comparison, Mr.
and Mrs. Goody-Two-Shoes refused to believe
that they had taken in Rosemary's
Baby and denied their darling the chance of
a lifetime to take on the role of
Regan MacNeil in _The Exorcist_,
ironically, a part which she was born to
play. It was the other bad actress,
Linda Blair, who snatched up that one.
Nor would the selective pair allow their good girl to cavort around naked in
_The Blue Lagoon_, while the vacant Christopher Atkins caressed her sultry
bosom. So that role wound up with the equally-talented (but far hotter),
Brooke Shields.
No, our dearest Dana is going to be a perfect little angel
and star in
wholesome fair.

Like 'Diff'rent Strokes'.

With nowhere to go
but hell, Plato decided to steer her career in the
direction she seemed a
natural for - selling her body for money. Hooking (or
is that hookering?) up
with Playboy in 1989, Plato showed off her innumerable
needle punctures and
crack pallor for the benefit of horny, teenaged
speed-addicts everywhere. The
magazine public who weren't tripped out of
their mind were not so easily
fooled, however.
By 1991, Plato's spreads were even more finished than
Plato's actor's resume,
and the young bimbo was following her dreams by
exploiting her God-given
gifts of armed robbery and forgery. In between trips
to the county jail, she
made a comeback, of sorts, starring in fine cinematic
cow dung like the
immortal _Bikini Beach Race_ and her apparent
screen-biopic, _Compelling
Evidence_.

But it was 1997's dyke-fest titled,
ironically, _Different Strokes_ that Dana
Plato's breasts really got to
shine. The act of Plato's not-so-luscious
hooters frollicking around in the
company of another hot-to-snot lesbian was
too much for the MPAA who stamped
the film with an instant X.
Would that X stand for X-addict, by any chance?
During Plato's most productive period of filling up the straight-to-video
section over at the local Blockbuster, Dana found her raging libido no longer
satisfied by that of the male species. Long before Ellen DeGeneres made it
fashionable, Plato came out as a lesbian in the lesbo-pride mag, Girlfriends.
Long after David Bowie and Lou Reed made it fashionable, Plato renegged on
her statement. The few friends the publicity-starved Plato had left at this
point must have realised that if their crack whore of a pal becomes any more
sexually-confused, she'll have to don a silly hat, gaudy glasses, and a
sequin-studded outfit and sing 'The Bitch Is Back'.
Miss Plato guested on
the Howard Stern show but three days before her death
in a last-ditch effort
to try to convince some terminally-gullible moron that
Her Wastedness had
been clean and sober for an entire decade. Smart
Stern-fans spotted the
tell-tale signs of pain-killer withdrawals and called
up to laugh at her,
prompting the little liar to "come clean" about a wisdom
tooth extraction and
submit a strand of her greasy, lice-ridden hair for a
drug test.

Gee, Dana,
we'd be interested in seeing the results of that one.
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