2017-12-21 16:58:23 UTC
So the radio and TV stations have been playing the annual press
release from whatever group it is that compiles the list of phrases
people want to die. I believe they said this year's top phrase, or one
of them, is "Fake news."
I've been on record for a long time as saying one of my biggest pet
peeve phrases is "human resources." But there's another one you hear a
lot at this time of year:
"Are you ready for Christmas?"
What does that even mean? Well, I've put my lights up, and I've got my
travel plans pretty well figured out, so ... wait ... are you asking
me if I've finished my Christmas shopping? Is "Are you ready for
Christmas?" code for "Have you finished your Christmas shopping?" I
*think* it is, and first of all, I think that's gross. Second of all,
if that's what you mean to ask me, then ask me "Have you finished your
Christmas shopping?" instead of "Are you ready for Christmas?" because
then at least I'll know what you mean. Third, of all, NO, I haven't,
and everyone please stop hounding me about it. I do my shopping late.
I enjoy doing it that way. I'm not procrastinating, I just like it
better. I'll be "ready for Christmas" (wink, wink) in plenty of time.
I've learned to just dismiss that question with an insincere "yeah,"
whenever it's asked of me.